Hello, I'm Lewis Bond from Stockport (near Manchester); and if you were to read this description before 31st March 2011 at 20:20 you would have seen an incredibly long tale. Only few are privileged to have seen it. I like acquiring bitches and money, swearing, venti caramel frappacinos coffee based with cream, Subway, making bets with God (I always win), making noises in a silent room and not sleeping.
FAVOURITE MUSIC: Avenged Sevenfold, Muse, System Of A Down, My Chemical Romance, Nirvana, Foo Fighters, Rise Against, Rage Against the Machine, Enter Shikari, Rolling Stones, Jimi Hendix, Maximum the Hormone, Led Zepplin The Prodigy, N.W.A, Wu-Tang Clan, OFWGKTA and Letlive.
FAVOURITE FILMS: Pulp Fiction, Goodfellas, Fight Club, The Dark Knight, A Clockwork Orange, Oldboy, The Good the Bad and the Ugly, Inception, Clerks, along with maaaaanny others.
TV I like is Dexter, The Wire, Sopranos, Family Guy, Cowboy Bebop, Boardwalk Empire and South Park.
I'm also an atheist whose ambition it is to become a filmmaker. Don't take my Tumblr too seriously....cos I will shove my foot so far up your arse, the water on my knee will quench your THIRST! Enjoy ^_^

(Source: kensieshomeforimaginaryfriends, via the-absolute-funniest-posts)

(Source: good-notgreat, via soulharbour)

(Source: maryyys, via daysofthephoenix)

My wife said I never lift a finger around the house.
So I did.
The middle one.

(Source: veganlove, via soulharbour)

(Source: goddessthedivinemotherofuniverse, via yrodyknuh)

(via robotindisguise)

(Source: potbc)

(Source: jecht-modding-king, via father-spliffmas)

Teacher: Why did you not study?
Me: A year has 365 days for you to study. After taking away 52 Sundays, there are only 313 days left. There are 50 days in the summer that is way too hot to work so there are only 263 days left. We sleep 8 hours a day, in a year, that counts up to 122 days so now we're left with 141 days. If we fooled around for only 1 hour a day, 15 days are gone, so we are left with 126 days. We spend 2 hours eating each day, 30 days are used in this way in the year, and we are left with 96 days in our year. We spend 1 hour a day speaking to friends and family, that takes away 15 days more and we are left with 81 days. Exams and tests take up at least 35 days in your year, hence you are only left with 46 days. Taking off approximately 40 days of holidays, you are only left with 6 days. Say you are sick for a minimum of 3 days, you're left with 3 days in the year to study! Let's say you only go out for 2 days... You're left with 1 day. But that 1 day is your birthday.